What is the Lord expecting from us in our relation with Him? First let’s be reminded, God The Father, “…SO 1LOVED the world that He gave His ONE AND ONLY SON, that whoever believes in Him shall not perish but have eternal life. For God did not send His Son into the world to condemn the world, but to save the world through Him. Whoever believes in Him is not condemned…” (John 3:16-18) 1agapaō: a divine, self-sacrificial love, exemplified in God’s offering of His only Son. Just to make it very clear: “This is love: not that we loved God, but that HE LOVED US AND SENT HIS SON as an atoning sacrifice for our sins.” (1 John 4:10) Just to distinguish between God’s love and our human love: phileō: denotes an ‘inferior’ human love, more akin to a warm, friendly affection. The difference in these two terms is illustrated in John 21.
“There were together Simon Peter, and Thomas, Nathanael, and the sons of Zebedee, and two other of his disciples. Simon Peter says to them, I am going fishing. The word he used for “going” here is “hupagō” which means to withdraw or retire (as if sinking out of sight)! He said “I’m giving up this ministering and going back to fishing.” “They said, we will also go with you. They went, and entered into a ship immediately; and that night they caught nothing.” (John 21:2-17) “…when it was morning, Jesus stood on the shore: but the disciples did not know that it was Jesus. Then Jesus said to them, Children, do you have any meat? They answered him, No. Jesus said to them, Cast the net on the right side of the ship, and you’ll find. They cast, and now they were not able to draw it for the multitude of fishes. Simon Peter went up, and drew the net to land full of great fishes, a hundred and fifty three: there were so many, yet was not the net broken. Jesus fixed them breakfast and when they had dined, Jesus said to Simon Peter, Simon, son of Jonas, do you love [agapaō] me more than these (the 153 fish)? Peter said to Him, Yes, Lord; you know that I love [phileō] you. Jesus said to him the second time, Simon, son of Jonas, do you love [agapaō] me? Peter said, Yes, Lord; you know that I love [phileō] you. Jesus said to him the third time, Simon, son of Jonas, do you love [phileō] me? (Do you even love me with a love of emotion???) Peter was grieved because He said to him the third time, Do you even Love [phileō] me? And Peter said to him, Lord, you know all things; you know that I love you. The Lord wants our divine, self-sacrificial love so that we will believe Him and trust Him.
-Bill Stockham